Cause you're my miracle

OMG PHUKET IN 6 HOURS TIME!!

I'm lying on bed, waking at 6plus am

Starting to feel the real excitement!
And for the first time, I haven even pack my bag!
Haha!

I believe it will be a freaking fun trip!


too much excitement contains in my mind and heart.
Gotta go prepare.
OH YAY MAC BFAST LATER!

TADA!

I shall blog first. Before I go over to jac's house for party!

Woohoo! 2010 gonna be over in a few hours time.
Overall good and bad. Happy and sad.
What's over is over. Shall welcome 2011 with some expectations and happiness!

Lots of thing to look forward:

Bonus
Phuket trip
Bangkok trip
Starting of school
Last day of work
More birthday celebrations
Weddings!
My NZ cousinsss
Iphone 4

Maybe there's more. (:


Anyw, happy 2011! Resolutions will never be fulfil.
So I wish I can be rich and slim down jiu hao!


Lol gonna go bath and gotta rush to jac's house.
Gotta prepare food and casino! Haha
Will have fun tonight!

It has been a week already.
i thought all along if i keep myself busy i will not be thinking about anything.
busy at work, celebrating my birthday, meeting friends for dinner all this
but before i sleep, the images of us keep running back to my mind.
and it is so hurting that things happen this way.

i dont think im feeling any better after suggesting this breakup.
im not concentrating on work and hasnt been eating much.
hasnt been sleeping well.
i dont even know wtf im thinking really.
i want this and dont want that. a while later i dont want this i want that.
WHAT THE FUCK am i thinking? i cant even think with a clear mind.
at times, i got the urge to msg you i miss you so much
but yet i didnt and i dont think i can anymore.
at times, how i wish you are in front of me and i can just hug you and cry.
but i know i cant anymore.
when i have something to share, you are the first person that came to my mind.
and i didnt know i miss you so much.
i started the break up thing and now WHY THE FUCK AM  I THINKING THIS WAY NOW?

i dont know how long i need to be tortured like this.
it is so hard for me to drag myself to work everyday, standing in the mrt thinking of this
and when im going home listening to those songs we used to hear tgt,
it is so heart wrenching till i can just break down anywhere.

tell me what i should do. i really want to get out of this thing.
should i just let go of everything?
i dont want to feel the pain anymore.

and im really really sorry to you because i really dont know how to face you now.
i dont know what i should say to you if i pick up the call now.


and yes, recently work is so sucky that it worsen my mood.
please DONT recall me back tml even when there's ppl mc okay.


Goodbyes will always hurt, pictures will never replace having been there, memories good and bad will bring tears, and words can never replace feelings

I'm so happy! Spending my 22 years old birthday with loves!


Happy birthday to myself :)

Yeah I'm kinda feel old again :(

I finally blogged again.

I didn't know my friends still come here and read now and then. Haha. Still love them max. You guys know who you are :))

Everytime I come here, I always blog thing about him.
Coz I have nowhere to say my thoughts to who and I think writing down is a way of releasing my stress and unhappiness down.

The whole week has been a unpleasant one (excluding meetups with the loves)
I have been sick for the whole week alr. Voice breaking. Even my new colleague also see me like a weirdo.
Though is an hurtful week for me, but I can really see who is really there for me. Needless to say who are they. U guys really cheer me. I really appreciate all of you tt has nv fail to be with me each time I need help. :):)

And on top of tt, I cried too much. And I'm really numb le. My heart already stopping coz of too many things happening this few weeks. I need time. I need it to think carefully and to decide what I shld do next. I'm so affected till I can't eat finish my food, can't sleep well. You all know my patterns. I'm a big eater and I sleep always.

And one more week to my twenty twos! I seriously don't really look forward. Lol! I feel old though I'm the youngest among most of them. And I still have a few celebrations next week. I will keep myself happy and I want to find back my old me. I need to know what I want from now. I don't wanna waste any more time making myself agony. And coz I'm gonna be 22, I hope I will be more mature in handling things. Spend more time with my family. Yeah and maybe strike 4d (HAHA)


And I kinda excited for xmas already! Woohooo

I gotta prepare to meet my brothers. Coz we gonna mj! And they are always funny max. Trying their best to make me happy! Hopefully they wun say my new hair is like shit. Lol!


And I only would wan to say to you is thanks for making me even stronger. I need MORE time ALONE.

And I blogged thru my purple bb :)

I have a lot of things I wanna complain, want to whine about.

I think I can't carry on. I'm not the strong girl anymore.

Maybe I need to have a good break. I feeling so weak that I can cry everyday. I already ren till I can't take it anymore.

Tell me what I should do. I need someone badly to talk to.

Is been a month ever since i last blogged.

This whole month i went through ups and more downs.

needless to say, work is never ending and tiring
bf is forever making me angry everyweek but we still patch things up in the end.
meeting up with dearies friends that's makes me happy everytime!
talked to baby on msn is love too, i missed her too much :(((

i passed my 5k limit test. goodie, no need to run in and out everytime just to sign cheques.

nothing much to blog about.

just that humans are selfish; i need to overcome this factor
maybe im too much towards you, that i didnt consider your feelings enough.
i still love you as much but i hope you wont make me angry every weekend.
it is very upset to quarrel everytime. :((


my malaysia trip is just a few days away. i hope this trip will bring us even closer.
and our first trip with sengchengie & jacinth! cant wait. :))))

I'm not in a good mood; I feel so useless
no matter how hard I try, no matter how much effort I wan to put in,
I guess we can't go back to what we used to be.

I chose to not follow the advices and decide to go with you.
And now, somehow it ponder me to think twice.
I just don't know what to do. All I ask is to have more attention from you
yet what I get is black shot, alantics, etc.

U know I don't like it u choose to carry on. U know I will be angry yet u choose to do that.
U know it yet u choose to make me upset and cry.

U did not even try to put yourself in my shoes and if I'm the one doing it to you,
will u be happy? Yet u keep claiming I don't understand.

I really need a shoulder to cry on, to pour out all my sorrows
and I know u will never be the 1st one coz you don't care.

Give up anot?

I'm tired of this life already. Work sucks; u suck; everything suck.

 
im currently at dearest house to blog.

she is sleeping while awaiting for her friend sarah to come.
we can MJ, eat durians, drive around later, stayover and heart to heart talk! 

today at sentosa is funnnnn! though we spend 3 bucks and go in for abt an hour or so, but is worth it :D


shall upload all those photos on fb soon! 


and i love bf and baby alot :)))



loves <3

it's gonna rain again :(

Last week went to mandrain oriental for dinner buffet with family and bf.
it was damn delicious for all the seafood and lots of sweet stuffs for dessert.
and their chocolate cake is almost the same as cafe swiss!
whoa reminds me of last time i used to keep eating whenever they have chocolate cake during their lunch buffets.
kinda miss it :)
and the price is also nice as well - i paid 30% of the bill for this,
and im heart pain =x well, just for mummy's birthday, worth it :)


sent baby off to the airport next day, super miss her and we had one of the best talk on last friday at bishan,
really let our inner feelings out. and i love her ttm and i hope she will be back to sg soon again!
hope her grandma is feeling better each day too :)

was working for 5.5 days. how tiring.
but meeting up with tricia dearest was fun last thurs. haha :)
and we gonna k next week!

got my uniform last wed before meeting up bffs.
went sushi tei with them and sashimi really rocks leh.
we were like hmmminnggg when we eat.
a great short meet up :))

i still think the uniform length is still long though it just touch my knee.
custom made, and the jacket seems tight and i cant raise my hands up properly :(
but i will have uniform allowance from monday onwards! happy abit lah. at least dont have to think of wat to wear!


meetup with bf as usual . he bring me go eat bedok 85 & you ji mee sua after work. so nice of him
but we bomb up our pocket just by eating pizza ytd! but still loves loves. :):)


and lastly, i still miss dbsk. though they are not performing as a group now,
but i will still wait for them to come back and create many beautiful songs.
dbsk hwaiting :)  and xiah junsu is coming to sg on 1st may! and i cant go :(

hopefully they will come to sg as a grp next time. i will definately spend all the money just to see them :) haha


gonna prepare to meet my dear b1 :)
next week will be full of funs :):)